New Beginnings and Old Endings

I said goodbye again today. I made the hour-long drive down to the Mather airport to go one more time to a place where I learned so much, taught others, and had many memorable experiences. Today it was with a big duffel bag full of uniforms, accessories, and company property. I wouldn't be needing those anymore. It was a very relaxed couple hours - turning in my stuff, signing a paper, chatting with the few remaining colleagues who hadn't left for the airlines yet, meeting the new guys who were just starting their own new chapters, wishing my former student all the best. I stayed longer than I planned; that's something I always tended to do there. But finally it was time to head out the door, presumably this time for good - presumably, because who knows where life will take me; I didn't imagine I would end up working here twice.

The goodbye was strangely easy this time. I guess it just helps when you're ready to move on and you've had time to prepare for it. It's not that I won't miss the place. I am grateful for my time at a place with such awesome people and amazing airplanes, and it was good to have this familiar place to land at when I dropped back in from Indonesia during a rather scarce time in the aviation industry. It was also a really helpful refresher to get back into the swing of things in an airline-oriented training environment. But I have to admit, I'm ready to take the next step and see what is beyond flight instructing.

Though it wasn't a difficult goodbye to say today, it was still an ending. And when something that has been a part of my life ends, I invariably find myself thinking of other goodbyes and chapters that have ended. Some are chapters that I have fond memories of, others are ones remembered with a wistful longing to relive them. Some bring smirks of amused recollection and a sense of relief that they are indeed over, while others cause my eyes to mist up as I think of how the story was just getting started when the book itself abruptly ended. Those are the ones that are the hardest to forget and the most poignant to recall.

Now I'm saying another farewell to something familiar and preparing to step into a very big unknown. What I'm currently shooting for could be a short ride to a dead-end. Or it might be the start of something that I could have only dreamed of - except that dreams can sometimes have a way of turning out to be pretty empty too, sometimes. To be certain, I have very mixed feelings about what's next. What I'm hoping for the most is a touch from God, a clear direction from Him.

Well, the next few weeks and months will be telling. I'll try to post the highlights as I have time. And though I'm apprehensive as I step forward, I have to remind myself of some words that speaks courage:

"And the Lord, He is the One who goes before you.

He will be with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you; do not fear nor be dismayed." 

Deuteronomy 31:8 NKJV.